Oh, Rockstar. Honey. Baby. My darling GTA holes. Corporate Uncritical Networking Teams of epic proportions! We NEED to talk… Just, in general, like, wanna get a pint after reading? Your treat, of course.
To briefly summarize before we get to the news: Rockstar has been making so much money from GTA 5 and GTA Online that they’re basically the Disney of gaming companies, in that they don’t really have to try too hard to make stuff anymore because that Scrooge McDuckian money pool isn’t exactly going anywhere! After 8 years of expansions to GTA 5 Online (psst, which we have!) we now get the GTA Trilogy Definitive Edition.
Criticisms range from bugs and glitches to strange spelling mistakes from a corner-cutting AI of samurai proportions and- THE BURGER DOESN’T SPIN!? And I’m sorry, “the taste of a real man’s heat” sounds more like a bikram yoga joint than a hotdog place! If I wanted to taste a man’s heat, I’d glaze myself in hot sauce and become a contortionist!
GTA 6: The Good, The Bad and the Ugly: Known leaker who covers titles from Rockstar and Quantic Dreams games (AccNGT) has recently aired some concerns on Twitter regarding how ‘Some people don’t realize how chaotic the development is’, also claiming that although the visuals will be high-quality, it will be a disappointment if it were to release next year.
While Naughty Dog and Rockstar have been known to get their hands dirty with crunch time issues (which you can find out more on here), given the recent announcement of the Dr Dre expansion for GTA, I doubt even Rockstar would confirm anything for GTA 6 this soon.
AccNGT doesn’t clarify if they’re talking about the gameplay or story mode being the main things to suffer.
Other leakers have claimed that GTA 6 allegedly started production shortly after former co-founder and writer Dan Houser left Rockstar. His departure has lead to Rockstar’s parent company Take-Two to dropping in stocks, so GTA 6 may well end up being the Metal Gear Survive of the Grand Theft Auto universe if this is true.
Product Poems:
Oh Rustler, pool Hustler. What’s that? Thrustmaster stole my stripper name!?
No straight roads? That’s what he said! I’ll get it! “Not at 3am hun”.
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